The Story of my return to Brighton

I have many stories of how my universe has guided me into the next phase of my life, this is just one of them. This particular story taught me that my universe has my back, always, and that my only work is to do that which I am inspired to do, but no more, no forcing, no letting my ego take the reins, just quite simply living my best life with a knowing that all is well, and when the time is right, I will be guided to take the necessary steps to moving into the next chapter.

A brief background catchup is probably in order, just to give you an idea of where I am coming from....

In 2018 I moved from Norfolk to Brighton, I'd always known I would leave Norfolk, but until the time came, I had no idea that it would be to go to Brighton. I loved it as soon as I arrived, I, felt comfortable in a way that I had not experienced before, I felt at home. At the time I was on a quest for adventure, and adventure was what I got, on a level I was not prepared for. I dealt with it, and I got through it, but after three years it began to overwhelm me, and I felt the need to leave. I had no idea where I was going, all I knew was that Brighton and I were done, and it was time to move on. It would be another eighteen months before I left, but in that time a number of synchronicities occurred which resulted in my daughter and I leaving Brighton together, something which I had not even considered eighteen months previously. In fact she was the one who eventually chose our destination, she wanted to study accounting and Southampton had the perfect course for her requirements, I had no objections to Southampton, so that was where we went. For me personally, I had no idea where this would lead me, but what I discovered as the months went by, was that I missed Brighton. This came as a huge shock initially, I don't believe in going back, and I truly believed that Brighton and I were done, so I didn't really know what to do with this new information. This was probably about a year in, and we had already decided that we would stay in Southampton for two years, so I still had time to let this information settle before I made any new decisions. What I did keep hearing from my guides was that I would go back in June of 2024, I was open to this idea, but wasn't able to accept that as part of my path until February of the same year. And then I knew, for sure, that I would return to Brighton in June 2024.

That was the only information I had, I had a job and a home in Southampton, but I had no issue with giving those up when the time came, and I had absolutely no idea how I would transition back, but I did know that when I needed to know, the information would be given to me.

I had decided that finding a new home was probably my first priority, I felt that getting a job first would be too much pressure, and around April I had begun to look around for rooms and jobs, just to see what was out there. And then around the third week in April things began to get interesting……..

I had set up my job alerts for any new jobs posted in the charity retail sector, which was where I felt most competent and comfortable. A job appeared for a part time, relief shop manager, for a charity that was based in Brighton, which would mean covering any one of nine shops when managers were off sick or on annual leave. When I had previously lived in Brighton, I had also managed a charity shop, but my dream was to move around different shops because I like the variety, unfortunately that wasn’t something that they offered at the time, so it didn’t happen. I also was only prepared to work part time, as I neither wanted nor needed to work full time, so when this opportunity showed itself, it had my name written all over it, so it was a no brainer, despite not previously wanting to get a job first, I could not let this opportunity pass me by, I had to apply.

So I filled out the application form, and sent it off.

My application was accepted and I was invited to interview. Thankfully it was to be an in person interview, after covid, video interviews became the norm for a while, but I was never a fan of those so was grateful for the opportunity to present myself in person. I was to be interviewed by one of the shop managers and the area manager, and as soon as we sat down, the area manager asked if we had met before because there was something very familiar about me, not visually, but she recognised my voice. I had no such recognition initially, but then I began to think how we could have met, we both twigged at the same time, and frankly I was speechless…………

Back in 2018, when I moved to Brighton, I hadn’t worked for a while because I had come into some money, that money was running out, and I guessed I had about six months worth left. That journey is a whole other story in itself, but long story short, I needed to downsize, and although I had already got rid of lots of my belongings, I knew I had to get rid of more, so I worked out where the nearest charity shop was, and on a regular basis would take as much as I could carry to them. Because I was such a regular visitor, I formed a connection with the lady who worked there, I came to look forward to our chats, since chatting to her was so easy, and I told her all about my reasons for ending up in Brighton, and how I was in the process of looking for work. Eventually I’d given all I had, life moved on and I didn’t really visit the shop again. When a few months later I got my first job in a charity shop, I went back to the shop because I really wanted to tell her of my achievement. But she wasn’t there, and I never saw her again…

Until six years later, when she, as area manager, was interviewing me for a position that she herself had just taken up when we first met. She was even able to relay the conversations that we had had back then, and I couldn’t believe that she could remember that from six years ago. By now I was convinced that the universe was guiding me through every step of this process, it was all just falling into place, all I had done was follow the inspiration, and at every turn I was astonished with the way things were happening. Suffice to say, just a week later, I was offered the position, and I was to start my new role in June!

All that was left, was for me to hand in my notice on my current employment and living arrangements, I’m in a phase of renting rooms, so it makes it very easy for me to move about at very short notice - the last step was to find somewhere to live.

I wasn’t too concerned, since my universe was clearly on a roll, it had got me this far, so I had no reason to doubt it would finish the job, all I had to do was to hold my trust in the process, which can sometimes get a little tricky when we look around at the reality facing us, but I was determined not to start doubting it now.

Two weeks before the start of the role, I had to take my documents, in person, to my new place of work, which was the perfect opportunity to view any available rooms. The question was, could I find one that worked for my timing requirements? I needn’t have worried, I went to view a room, accepted it on the spot, and the date I was able to move in was exactly the date I needed.

I never doubted my universe, but the continuous synchronicities never stopped blowing my mind. I had handed this whole process over completely, in part because much of my time in Southampton had been spent with my trying to force things to work in my favour, and I was stressed the whole time. Eventually I had to conclude that I clearly had no idea what I was doing, and that my universe had full overview of proceedings, so it was much better positioned to put everything that I wanted in place. My stress levels were minimised, and the whole journey was a much more pleasant one.

It was a great reminder for me, sometimes I get impatient and try to intervene, but in doing so, all I’m doing is getting in my own way. My universe is simply my multidimensional future self, guiding me to where I already am, it’s not some external force trying to coerce me into following it’s will, it’s literally future me, helping this current version of me to catch up. And quite frankly, I need all the help I can get, trying to do it alone is hard, letting our universe help us, just turns everything into a fun game.

Of course, we all get to choose our own way

xx

Finding yourself in a place that feels like constant numbness can feel wrong, because we have allowed ourselves to be told that if we’re not constantly doing something then we’re not a valuable member of society, and that doing nothing is pure laziness or depression.

This is totally back to front, doing nothing with no distractions is the most beautiful gift we can give ourselves. Most people are uncomfortable with that state of neutrality and so for a long time it has been deemed to be a state of depression. It’s not been recognised that simply sitting, with absolutely no thoughts going through our head is a wonderful place to be. It means that we’ve managed to temporarily close the door to our ‘reality’ and are standing waiting, with open arms, for whatever is coming next.

I’ve been there a few times in the past, sometimes feeling disconnected for weeks, and I’m only now realising that it was always followed by substantial changes, because I was able to follow directions from my guides, that I hadn’t been able to hear in all the chatter.

We all have seasons. There are times when we full on motivated, getting loads of stuff done. Then there are times when we feel like we’re just plodding along, just taking life as it comes. And then there are times when we feel as though we have shut down completely, and just getting through the day is about all we can manage.

All of these states are valid, and all of these states are necessary. We have become far too good at judging ourselves as lazy or depressed just because we don’t want to participate in life for a while. But dropping out occasionally has great value, it’s where we grow.

It can be likened to a caterpillar, cocooning itself (which incidentally goes to mush before reforming as a butterfly), and no-one can deny that that is a hugely beneficial process, life giving in fact.

And we don’t judge trees through the winter months do we? We don’t say to the tree ‘look at you just standing there doing nothing, you can’t even be bothered to produce a few leaves’, because we know that although we can’t see it, the tree is going through a massive transformation, and when the spring arrives, right on cue, it will wake up and begin to sprout new life again.

That’s how we work too, we need those shutting down periods in order to grow and transform, so we need to recognise that it’s ok when that happens. It’s just a temporary phase that we will move through quickly if we can accept it, and let it do what it needs to do.

Asking ‘what’s wrong with me’ will take you on a journey with no answer, and so will hold you in that place until you ask a different question.

And the reason there is no answer is because there is nothing wrong with you, so your universe can’t answer because it’s a question that it literally doesn’t understand.

xx